Spiritual Growth When You Feel Distant From God: Emily on Miscarriage, Grief, and Everyday Epiphanies

Spiritual growth can feel impossible when you're doing all the "right" things and still feel distant from God. In this episode, Emily shares what happened after a miscarriage shattered her faith, her sense of safety, and even her connection to her husband. She was in full-time ministry, in seminary, saying the right words and checking the right boxes. But inside, she felt abandoned, angry, and confused.


Emily opens up about the grief nobody saw, the shame of not knowing how to talk about it, and the spiritual spiral that followed. She describes bouncing between "God let me down" and "maybe I'm being punished," and how isolation made everything heavier.


The turning point came on a New Year's Eve when her husband landed in the ICU, and she finally hit rock bottom. Sitting in her car in the dark, she laid it all out before God. No polished prayer. Just raw honesty. And the next day, she decided to stop going through motions and start rebuilding a real relationship with Jesus.


In this conversation, you'll hear:
- what faith looks like when grief makes you numb and angry
- how to rebuild when your spiritual life feels like performance
- why honesty with God is not disrespect, it's relationship
- how therapy and Jesus can work together in healing
- what "everyday epiphanies" are and how scripture becomes alive in ordinary moments (even spilled Kool Aid and apple picking)


Emily also shares how her journey shifted her from religious performance into faith in real life, and how learning to connect scripture to everyday moments helped her see God's character as healer, guide, comforter, and provider.


If you've been showing up, serving, leading, or doing all the things but still feel far from God, this episode is a gentle permission slip to be honest. Healing often starts there.