Walking With God: Relationship Not Religion | Perspectives

Hey friends, hand to heart, this episode landed deep for me. My sister Brianna joined me and we started with a little laugh about the plastic fork she carries in her purse - she has a phobia of metal on her teeth - and that easy, ordinary detail gave way to a much bigger conversation about how church can look good on the outside and feel empty on the inside.

Can I tell you something? The phrase religion versus relationship isn't just a sermon title for us. Brianna shared a season that felt like a breakup - twelve years in a church where she served, led young adults and children's ministry, and then began to see people she loved show their true colors. They were showing up to fill seats, not hearts, and that realization has a weight to it. I felt that with her.

Here's the thing: scripture matters. We talked about Proverbs 27:17, iron sharpens iron, because part of the pain comes when those around us who are supposed to sharpen and encourage us are using faith as a label instead of a living connection. We also talked about the Pharisees, because sometimes people around the pews know the language but not the heartbeat. There is a difference between quoting a verse and being shaped by the Spirit.

I remember asking Brianna about the moment she knew she couldn't keep pretending. For her it was a women's conference where the room pulsed with hungry hearts and the Holy Spirit moved - it was the contrast that woke her up. For my part, traveling and trying churches across the country has shown me how often sermons are motivational speeches instead of scripture-driven truth. When worship is shallow and teaching is thin, your soul notices.

So what can you do if you recognize this in your life? What helped Brianna and what I keep returning to are small, practical steps you can try this week.

• Pray honestly and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal what you need, not what looks good.
• Evaluate your community - are people sharpening you or just filling seats?
• Look for churches where scripture is read and applied, not just paraphrased.
• Give yourself permission not to fake it - faith needs authenticity, not performance.
• Find one tangible way to serve where you can both receive and give support.

Those moves aren't dramatic. They're not a checklist to prove you're holy. They're invitations to let your relationship with God shape the rhythms of your week instead of letting external expectations drive you. If you're in a season of disappointment or confusion, remember that leaving a place that hurts you doesn't mean leaving God. It can mean stepping toward a fuller experience of the Holy Spirit and truth.

I share this as someone who wants faith to be real in everyday life. If you're tired of religion and longing for a relationship, I'm with you. In this episode Brianna and I tell stories, name the hard feelings, and point to practices that helped us stay connected to Jesus even when the people around us didn't match our longing.

Please listen, share, and leave feedback about this episode.