Sharing Your Testimony Starts With Listening Before You Speak
How many of you have ever walked away from a conversation and thought, “Oof. I talked a lot… but did I actually love her well?”
I want to talk about sharing your testimony in a way that feels like Jesus. Not like a sales pitch. Not like a script. More like a safe place.
Because here’s the thing. (And yes, I’ve had to learn this the hard way.) Sharing your testimony is not only about what we say. It’s also about what we’re willing to hear.
Listening is part of sharing. It’s the forgotten skill of testimony.
Why sharing your testimony requires listening first
I used to think sharing your testimony meant you show up ready. Ready with the words, the point, the “lesson.” And sometimes God does give us words on the spot. But more often, I’ve noticed He gives me a pause first.
A look. A nudge. A quiet question in my spirit, “Jessica, are you listening?”
Sometimes we talk because we’re nervous
Can I be honest? Sharing your testimony can make us feel exposed. And when I feel exposed, I want to control the moment. I want to explain myself well. I want to make sure it lands right.
So I keep talking.
But love doesn’t rush. Love pays attention.
Listening creates the safety your story needs
Most women aren’t afraid of your story. They’re afraid of what happens after you share it.
Will you judge them if they don’t respond “right”? Will you try to fix them? Will you make their pain into your platform? Will you pressure them into a moment they weren’t ready for?
When you listen well, you answer those fears without saying a word. You show them, “You’re safe with me.”
And that changes everything about sharing your testimony.
What 1 Peter 3:15 says about sharing your testimony with gentleness
We can’t talk about sharing your testimony without talking about the posture we carry while we share.
1 Peter 3:15 (CSB) says, “But in your hearts regard Christ the Lord as holy, ready at any time to give a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you. Yet do this with gentleness and reverence.”
I love that it says reason for the hope. Not reason for your opinions. Not reason you’re right. Hope.
And it doesn’t just tell us to be ready to speak. It tells us how to speak. Gentleness and reverence.
Gentleness sounds like listening. Reverence sounds like honoring what God is doing in someone else’s life, even if it’s messy, even if it’s slow, even if it doesn’t look like our timeline.
Hope is the point, not the details
One of the biggest mistakes we make in sharing your testimony is thinking the details are the power.
Sometimes the details help. Sometimes they’re needed. But hope is the point. Jesus is the point. The cross is the point.
And listening helps you figure out what part of your story is actually needed in that moment.
How to stop fixing and start listening while sharing your testimony
Does this sound familiar?
A friend opens up. You can feel the weight of what she’s saying. And your brain starts scrambling, “What do I say? How do I help? How do I make this better?”
That urge to fix is so human. I get it.
But fixing and loving are not the same thing.
Ask yourself this one question
Before you jump in with advice, try asking yourself, “What would it look like to be present right now?”
Not impressive. Not polished. Present.
Because sharing your testimony is not a performance. It’s a relationship moment.
Three simple listening phrases that change the tone
If you want practical, here you go. These aren’t magic words. But they slow the room down in a good way.
- “Tell me more, if you want to.”
- “That makes sense.”
- “Do you want me to just listen, or do you want advice?”
That last one? It’s gold. It honors her. It creates safety. And it keeps sharing your testimony from turning into fixing her life.
Listening doesn’t mean you never share
Some of us hear “listen” and think, “Okay, so I should never talk about what God has done.” No. That’s not it.
Listening is how you know when to speak, what to say, and what to leave out.
It’s discernment in real time.
Sharing your testimony with wisdom, boundaries, and discernment
I’ve said it before and I’ll keep saying it. Sharing your testimony is not about telling everything to everyone.
Not everyone has earned a front row seat to your whole story.
And honestly? That’s not harsh. That’s healthy.
Sometimes the bold thing is waiting
We have this idea that being “bold” means being loud. Or fast. Or public.
But I’m convinced the Holy Spirit nudges us to share what needs sharing, with whom, and when. There are times to speak, and times to wait. Being bold is obedience, not over-sharing.
Sometimes silence is the most trusting thing we can do.
What to pray before sharing your testimony
If you want a simple way to check your heart, pray through a few questions before you share.
- “Lord, what part of my story brings hope right now?”
- “Is this the right person for this part?”
- “Am I sharing to help, or am I sharing to relieve my own discomfort?”
- “What would gentleness sound like here?”
Sharing your testimony is always better when it comes from surrender, not strategy.
What it looks like in real life to listen and share your testimony
Let me paint a real picture. Nothing fancy.
You’re sitting across from a woman at coffee. She casually says something like, “I’ve just been tired lately.” But you can hear it. There’s more under it.
This is where sharing your testimony often goes off the rails. We jump in too quickly. We fill the space with our own story. We mean well, but we rush the holy moment.
Try this instead.
Step one, stay curious
You can say, “What kind of tired?”
Then stop talking.
And listen.
Step two, share small and honest
If she opens up and you sense it’s right, share a small piece. Not a speech. Not the whole timeline.
Something like, “I’ve had seasons like that. One thing that helped me was remembering God doesn’t ask me to carry everything alone.”
That’s sharing your testimony in a way that invites, not overwhelms.
Step three, offer hope, not homework
Sometimes we leave women with a list. Read this book. Do this study. Start this plan. Fix your schedule. Call your therapist. Join my group.
Some of those things are good. But in the moment, what people usually need first is presence.
Hope. Prayer. A friend who doesn’t flinch.
So you can ask, “Can I pray for you right now?”
Simple. Gentle. And honestly, powerful in the quiet way.
Practical ways to practice listening as you keep sharing your testimony
If you’re thinking, “Okay Jessica, but I’m not naturally good at this,” welcome to the club.
Listening is a skill. Which means we can practice it.
Try these this week
- In one conversation, decide you won’t interrupt. Not once.
- Ask two follow-up questions before you share your story.
- When you feel the urge to fix, whisper a quick prayer for wisdom.
- Share one short sentence from your testimony that points to hope.
- End with prayer or encouragement, not advice overload.
And friend, give yourself grace. Sharing your testimony isn’t about getting it perfect. It’s about loving people well and letting God do what only He can do.
Closing encouragement for sharing your testimony with a listening heart
If you’ve felt pressure to have the perfect words, I want to release you from that today.
You don’t have to be a speaker. You don’t have to have a microphone. You don’t have to have your story tied up with a neat bow.
Sharing your testimony can be quiet. It can be simple. It can look like sitting with someone, listening with an open heart, and then offering the piece of hope God gives you in the moment.
That kind of testimony changes a room. It builds trust. It builds community. And it looks a lot like Jesus.
So next time you feel that nudge to speak, take a breath first.
Listen. Then share.
