Discovering Spiritual Gifts Women Can Use to Serve With Genuine Joy and Love
How many of us have ever raised our hands to help, only to feel a little empty or even resentful inside? Can I tell you something? You are not alone in this. When it comes to discovering spiritual gifts women often feel called to serve but wonder why the joy sometimes fades. In our recent podcast episode, we pulled back the curtain on what it looks like to find and use your unique gifts - not out of obligation, but out of real love. And that's where the joy hides, right in the middle of serving as you are created to serve, even in Finding God in hard times.
What Does Discovering Spiritual Gifts for Women Even Mean?
I remember the first time I even heard the phrase "spiritual gifts." I was sitting in Bible study, pen in hand, thinking, okay, what do I have to offer that’s special? For so many women, there’s this quiet question: Am I gifted at all, especially if you’re still healing from spiritual perfectionism that makes serving feel like pressure instead of joy? Sometimes we imagine spiritual gifts mean standing on a stage or leading a ministry, which can fuel insecurity and dealing with doubt as Christian women quietly carry. But the truth is, discovering spiritual gifts women can use starts with what feels natural or meaningful to us, often flowing from deepening relationship with God rather than striving to impress.
Maybe you’re gifted in encouragement, and your handwritten notes make someone’s week. Perhaps hospitality is your thing, opening your home for coffee and conversation. Or maybe you organize, drive, sing, or simply notice when someone’s hurting—within a thriving Christian community for women. Every one of those is a gift - and every one matters when you offer it in love, not because you have to. Our conversation on the podcast reminded me again: God delights when we discover our talents and use them as He meant us to.
How Can We Avoid Burnout and Serve With Real Joy?
Can I ask, have you ever found yourself dragging the trash out alone, watching others laugh and chat while you feel annoyed or left out? (Hand to heart, I have.) The truth is, serving from a place of obligation - instead of love - is what leads to burnout and resentment, but Christian community support during adversity can help us serve with shared strength and grace. Burnout sneaks up quietly, especially when we neglect spiritual self care practices while continuing to serve. You say yes because it’s needed, or because someone else asked, but soon it just feels heavy—especially when obeying God without resentment hasn’t been clearly discerned.
Discovering spiritual gifts women already have is the key to avoiding burnout, especially when it’s shaped by hearing God's voice daily instead of external expectations. We talked about this on the show, and I’ll say it here too: Don’t ignore that inner nudge. If your energy rises when you’re greeting people and making them feel seen, but falls when you’re in the kitchen, pay attention. Find ways to use the gifts that come naturally to you. And don’t be afraid to say no to areas that just don’t fit. God wants your joyful yes, not a weary maybe.
Here’s how I find joy and protect my heart from burnout:
- Pray before saying yes. Ask, "Lord, is this where You want me today?"
- Notice which activities fill you up and which leave you drained.
- Serve alongside people you love - your husband, kids, friends, or church sisters.
- Take breaks and allow yourself space to rest and reset.
- Remember, it is okay to step back when you feel tapped out.
Paul reminds us in Romans 12:6 (CSB): "According to the grace given to us, we have different gifts: If prophecy, use it according to the proportion of one’s faith." To me, that means each of us is wired uniquely. When we honor that, we serve with lightness instead of heaviness.
How Do I Figure Out What My Unique Gifts Are?
Most of us do not wake up one morning knowing exactly how God wants us to serve. Discovering spiritual gifts women can use starts with small steps and honest reflection. What makes you smile while serving? What needs do you notice? Where do you find yourself offering to help, almost without thinking?
Ask Yourself Honest Questions to Listen for Your Gifts:
- Do I get joy from being behind the scenes or out front?
- Who do I love helping most - kids, elders, families, strangers?
- What compliments do people give me about how I serve?
- Which "chores" do not feel like chores when I do them for others?
- What serving memories bring a smile, not a sigh?
You can also ask trusted friends, family, or your small group: What gifts do you see in me? Sometimes others recognize our gifts before we do. Our community can call out the gold in us, naming strengths we might overlook. That is one reason it is so important to stay connected. Joy grows when we give and receive encouragement among friends.
Does Serving Always Have to Look Big and Impressive?
Let me be honest. Sometimes I fall into the trap of thinking that discovering spiritual gifts women are meant to use should make headlines or fill a church sanctuary. But I am learning that some of the sweetest moments come in small, almost hidden ways. Smiling at a neighbor. Sending a quick encouraging text. Baking extra for a mom who’s overwhelmed. Or just sitting quietly beside a friend who needs company. No stage, no spotlight, but the impact matters all the same.
Our podcast guest reminded me that your gift might be driving someone to a shelter or organizing books in your local library. Every part matters. It all counts when love is your reason for serving. When you serve out of who God created you to be, even tiny acts become holy ground.
Simple Ways to Serve Without Burnout:
- Smile at someone who looks down today.
- Write out a prayer and send it to a friend.
- Offer to help with whatever fits your energy and schedule.
- Ask God: "Where do You want me today? How did You design me to serve?"
When you show up as yourself, those small things add up. The world changes piece by piece, heart by heart.
What Happens When We Serve With Love Instead of Obligation?
I have learned this the hard way and the easy way. The times I serve because “I have to” are often the ones I leave tired and a little grumpy. But when I serve where my gifts line up with the moment, I leave lighter. Joy has a way of filling my cup as I pour out to others. And it’s contagious. The more we serve in love, the more others notice and want to join in. Our families, our kids, our friends—they all catch that spirit when it’s real and joyful.
Here’s the thing: Jesus never asked us to prove ourselves by doing busy work. He called us to live out the gifts the Father gave us. The difference is night and day. When you practice discovering spiritual gifts women are given, and you offer them freely, your serving moves from duty to delight. You grow stronger. Your community gets brighter. And souls—yours included—are refreshed.
Let’s Commit Together to Serving With Joy
If you are feeling weary or unsure where you fit, can I encourage you to pause? Ask God to show you what He created you to do. Look for places your heart comes alive as you help others. Take one small step this week, even if it’s smiling at someone who needs it. And let’s celebrate every act of service, no matter how quiet it seems. That is how we build a life of love, one joy-filled yes at a time.
Want to hear more practical stories, honest conversations, and encouragement just like this? Listen to the full episode of “How to Find Joy in Serving Others – Part 2” on the Perspectives Into Practice podcast. We are all in this together, friend. Let’s keep serving with joy, using the gifts God has perfectly placed in us.
If you want more encouragement and stories about discovering spiritual gifts women can use to light up their world, explore more episodes and blog posts right here. Let’s keep lifting each other up and choosing love over obligation day by day.
