Biblical wisdom for oversharing that keeps your heart protected
Can I tell you something? I used to think being “real” meant saying everything. All at once. With all the details.
But over time, I learned something gentler and honestly, way more freeing. biblical wisdom for oversharing doesn’t tell us to hide. It teaches us to share with love, maturity, and restraint. It helps us tell the truth without handing out pieces of our heart to people who haven’t earned that kind of access.
If you’ve ever walked away from a conversation (or hit “post” online) and thought, Why did I say all that? you’re not alone. Let’s talk about how to be honest, but not exposed. How to be open, but still protected.
Why biblical wisdom for oversharing starts with your heart
One verse has helped me more than I can explain. And it’s simple. Not complicated. Not heavy.
“Guard your heart above all else, for it is the source of life.” (Proverbs 4:23, CSB)
That word “guard” matters. It doesn’t mean we build a wall and never let anybody in. It means we pay attention to what gets access. We don’t toss our tender places into unsafe spaces and then act surprised when we feel raw afterward.
biblical wisdom for oversharing starts right here, asking a quiet question before we talk.
Is what I’m about to share going to protect the life God is growing in me?
Guarding your heart is not hiding your story
Some of us hear “guard your heart” and think it means we should never share anything personal. But that’s not what Scripture is saying. It’s saying your heart is valuable. So treat it like it is.
I love honest stories soaked in grace, but I also love when women have permission to share without rehashing every detail. Jessica’s writing often comes back to this idea that healing testimony is not about retelling everything, it’s about lifting up what Jesus has done .
That’s such a healthy filter for biblical wisdom for oversharing.
Oversharing can feel like connection, but leave you feeling drained
Have you noticed that? In the moment, it can feel like bonding. Like closeness.
And then later, you feel exposed. Or embarrassed. Or weirdly tired.
Sometimes oversharing is just nerves. Sometimes it’s loneliness. Sometimes it’s that ache to be understood right now. But biblical wisdom for oversharing invites us to slow down and ask, What am I reaching for?
How do I know if I’m being honest or oversharing?
Let me make this practical, because I know we’re all living real lives with real relationships.
Honesty is telling the truth with wisdom.
Oversharing is telling the truth without covering it in discernment.
And yes, sometimes we learn the difference the hard way.
Three quick “heart checks” before you share
These are questions I’ve learned to ask myself. Not perfectly. Just consistently.
Why am I sharing this? Am I sharing to bring hope, ask for prayer, or build trust? Or am I sharing because I feel anxious and I need someone to soothe me fast?
Who am I sharing with? Have they shown they can be safe, kind, and steady? Or do they gossip, interrupt, dismiss, or make everything about them?
What do I want the outcome to be? Do I want connection and clarity? Or am I trying to control what they think of me?
This is where biblical wisdom for oversharing gets simple. It’s not “never share.” It’s “share on purpose.”
A quick note about “safe people”
Not everyone can hold every part of your story. And that’s okay.
There’s a line from Jessica’s teaching that sticks with me, the idea that not everyone can speak into your season and sometimes you need less noise . That applies to advice, and it applies to access.
biblical wisdom for oversharing gives you permission to choose your people carefully.
Biblical wisdom for oversharing in friendships, church, and online
Okay. Let’s talk about real life.
Because what you share in a one-on-one coffee conversation is different than what you share in a small group. And that’s different than what you post online.
In friendships, aim for trust that grows over time
Some friendships can handle more weight. Some can’t. And you don’t find that out in one conversation.
Jessica’s tone in her writing is always invitational, like “pull up a chair” and “let’s talk” . I love that because it shows how community is supposed to feel. Warm. Safe. Not rushed.
So in friendships, biblical wisdom for oversharing looks like letting trust build slowly.
- Share a piece, not the whole novel
- Watch how they respond (do they stay gentle?)
- Share more over time if they prove trustworthy
In church settings, share for hope, not shock
Some of us have sat in groups where someone shared something super heavy, super fast. And then everybody just stared at their coffee cup.
If you’ve been that person, there’s no shame here. Seriously. We’ve all been learning.
But biblical wisdom for oversharing helps us ask, Will what I share build faith in the room? Will it bring hope? Will it point to Jesus?
That doesn’t mean we fake it or keep it surface-level. It means we share from healing, not just from urgency.
Online, remember you can’t control who holds your story
Here’s the thing about the internet. You can post something with the best heart, and it can land in places you never intended.
Jessica talks a lot about criticism, the sting of it, and the need to pray before speaking . That’s such good guidance here too. Because when you share online, you’re sharing with everyone, including people who don’t know your heart.
biblical wisdom for oversharing online looks like pausing and asking, Would I be okay if someone misunderstood this and I couldn’t explain?
A practical framework for biblical wisdom for oversharing
I like simple frameworks. Ones you can remember in the middle of a busy day, when you’re tired, emotional, or just wanting someone to understand you.
Here’s one I come back to.
1. Pray first, even if it’s a ten-second prayer
Not fancy. Not perfect. Just honest.
“Jesus, help me share this the right way.”
Jessica’s practical steps often start exactly here, pray first, every single time . That’s not just good advice. That’s biblical wisdom for oversharing in action.
2. Share facts, not every detail
This is big.
You can say, “We’re walking through a hard season” without listing every argument, every symptom, every screenshot, every fear.
Sometimes the most honoring thing you can do for your story (and your family) is keep certain details private.
3. Share your need clearly
A lot of oversharing happens when we don’t know what we’re asking for. So we say everything, hoping the other person will figure it out.
Try this instead:
- I could use prayer
- I need advice from someone wise
- I just need you to listen
- I need help with one practical thing
This is biblical wisdom for oversharing because it’s honest, but it’s also clear. And clarity protects relationships.
4. Decide what is “for now” and what is “for later”
Some parts of your story are for your journal. Some are for your counselor. Some are for your closest friend. Some might be for a stage one day.
And some are just for you and Jesus for a while.
If you’ve ever written out your story, you know there’s power in telling it in a safe space. Jessica’s book materials talk about writing your full narrative for your eyes (and God’s) first, without pressure to make it polished . I love that. That’s a wise place for the “too much” to go.
biblical wisdom for oversharing doesn’t shut you down. It simply puts things in the right place.
What do I do if I already overshared?
Deep breath. You’re not doomed. You’re not “too much.” You’re learning.
I’ve had moments where I wished I could rewind a conversation. And I’ve had moments where I wished I could un-post something.
Here are a few gentle next steps.
Ask God for peace, not punishment
This matters, because shame makes us spiral and overshare again. But peace helps us grow.
And remember, God is not asking you to perform. He’s inviting you into relationship. That theme shows up again and again in Jessica’s writing, real faith is presence, not perfection .
If needed, follow up with simple clarity
You don’t have to make it dramatic.
You can say something like, “Hey, I shared a lot yesterday. Thanks for listening. I’m learning to hold some of this with God first.”
That’s mature. That’s peaceful. That’s biblical wisdom for oversharing even after the fact.
Choose one trusted person for the deeper details
If your heart still feels full and you need to process, pick one safe person. Not ten. Not a comment section.
Community matters, but so does discretion. Jessica talks about staying rooted in honest, vulnerable community while also protecting your heart from unhelpful voices . Both can be true.
Simple takeaways you can practice this week
Let’s keep it doable. Small steps. The kind you can actually live out.
- Pause before you respond (especially when emotions are high)
- Pray a short prayer for discernment
- Share the headline, not the entire story
- Be clear about what you need (prayer, advice, listening)
- Pick safe people on purpose
- Write the rest down with God in private
Friend, you don’t have to swing between two extremes, saying nothing or saying everything. There’s a middle way. A healthy way.
And biblical wisdom for oversharing is part of how we love well, protect what’s tender, and still walk in the light.
We can be honest. We can be free. And we can still guard our hearts.
